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How the Big Dog Would Fix the Airline Industry

David McNew, Getty Images

Having recently experienced the process of flying in the United States, I have decided someone needs to come up with a better and more pleasureful way of flying than what Americans are exposed to today. I guess that someone is going to have to be me. With that said, I have some ideas that I think would “fly”, pardon the pun.

Having a three hour layover in Atlanta’s airport Sunday gave me plenty of time to think about ways things could be done better than they are being done currently. I have come up with 3 major ways to “clean up” the process of flying.

One would be to disallow any carry on luggage. Carry on baggage goes away. The only thing I carried on was a baseball digest magazine. I checked my bag so I wouldn’t have to lug it around or try to cram it in the over head bin.  I saw people trying to stuff bags that wouldn’t fit in a car trunk.  Plus they had to have people go through their bag and inspect it which makes for long lines and aggravated people even before you board the plane.  With my plan, you walk through the screening machine and head to your gate and off you go.

Secondly, I would board people onto the plane by seats and not rows.  All people in the window seats first, followed by people in the middle seats next and then finally people in the aisle seats last. It’s an orderly method of boarding. No stepping on and over the aisle people who boarded ahead of you. The exception would be for elderly and people with children.

My third suggestion would be to seat those people with connecting flights as close to the front of the plane as possible.  I have been on a late arriving plane when a person had 10 minutes to get to their next flight and had to wait for everyone in front to grab their overhead bags (which goes away with my plan) and de-board ahead of him.  I don’t think he made it to his next flight on time.

I know these are drastic suggestions but the point of the airlines is to get the passenger to their destination safely and on time. All of this monkey business of screening, carry on bags, and seating can be streamlined.

I know people will say, “hey I can’t use my computer if I have to check it in?” My answer to that is…”so what”.  If you can’t be away from your computer for 2 or 3 hours you have a real problem and flying isn’t the problem. Give yourself a break.

If Delta, Southwest, United or American Airlines would like to contact me, my number is 217-223-5292. I am at their service. With my plans, you might even enjoy flying again.


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